A Poem Written To A Girl on a Dating Website

What better way to distinguish yourself from the rabble than with an over-the-top artistic gesture.

This is definitely one of the stranger ways I’ve used my penchant for poetry.  I’ve been trying online dating and I got talking to a girl. We talked about poetry, I told her I wrote it, and that sometimes I write poems about/for the people in my life.  Without directly asking for a poem, she let me know she “wouldn’t mind” if I wrote one for her. So hey, why the hell not? It helps that this girl loves poetry herself. I wouldn’t recommend every guy on these sites with a love for verse lather on the Romeo with a Shakespearean iambic pent at the first sign of a shared interest in Breaking Bad. But I think in this instance it definitely raised the bar a bit in what was clearly a functioning chemistry between us.

The dating website was Plenty Of Fish or simply pof.com. This is important as much of the imagery is directly from or built on top of the idea of an ocean full of fish. I used that theme to describe my experience up to that point, and to describe how lovely she is. As the old saying goes, there’s plenty of fish in the sea – and this one is a real catch (and thus ends my awful joke quota for the day)! I also drew on vertebrate evolution as a metaphor, suggesting we leave the ocean -in this case the website – like some fish did eons ago, and evolve to take on new forms in a new environment – in this case for coffee. This may be the nerdiest way there is to ask a girl you like to meet up. #noshame

I STILL haven’t met her in person. Though that’s about to change later today when we finally go for that coffee. 😉


A Poem Written To A Girl On Plenty Of Fish

Plummet the depths of the ocean, you’ll find
Plenty of fish to choose from. Besides
The odd pike, there’s carp the colour of fire,
Wild tuna that move together, hiding
From the ever present predators, lining
Their flanks with the flesh of eachother.

My friend caught a fugu in a coral reef,
No food but plenty of poison, he’d speak
of the fools and the lies, the sharks, the light
That filtered grey in the blue, the heat
That drained away with time in the tides,
and the pressure of the crushing water.

I too fished the swells for the prize.
But little did I find, Besides
An octopus that inked my eyes.
As I walked upon the seabed, a fish,
Revealed herself in the faint light,
And with a simple, graceful, “Hi”
She’d hooked my mind.

For her scales were multi-coloured, shiny,
Like the mermaid tails of a story, and a story
She told of hues she wore, the funny,
The epic, the sorry. I listened closely,
Her words were bubbles floating joyfully,
And the eyes, though still a distance,
Pushed me from my footing. For she
Had eyes that that sang soprano, vibrato
were my nerves. By and by, peacefully,
My mind just swam beside her.

A time will come to leave the water.
Like fish of old became the crawlers,
I’d leave the ocean, become a frog,
Become a lizard then a bird.
And then I’d chirp the words that say,
“So lovely it is to see you today,
So shiny and pretty your brand new feathers,
Like the lovely scales, but even better,
Cause now the only thing between,
With water gone, it’s just the weather.

What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever done online as a gesture to someone you liked?


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